27 Days to 30 - Prideful

Today started off great - I finally tried the strawberry white chocolate french toast and it was as amazing as I imagined...along with mimosas...and then sweet red wine...with a side of great girl talk with Ebony. (I know, I know - I MUST hit the gym tomorrow.)

Yet tonight my spirit feels unsettled - I do not know if it is anxiety or pride about this next step in my life. Nevertheless, I pulled out my Bible to mull some things over while I continued to question the purpose behind it all.

At times I am too analytical for my own good and this can be both a blessing and a curse. I am my biggest critic, always so hard on myself - I hate to feel as though I failed at anything and I have a hard time accepting failure in any capacity - I am always looking for another alternative or method to succeed whatever it is I wanted to accomplish instead of sometimes just letting it be.

Determination is a great asset, but some things just aren't worth the effort - instead of accepting this, I become more persistent. Why is this? Is it my damaged pride if I admit defeat? Or even the fact that I was wrong? I hate more than anything for someone to tell me "I told you so" - allow me to make my mistakes and learn the lessons set out for me. This is my journey. But is my pride standing in the way of sometimes asking for help.

As I continue to ponder (nope, my mind will not shut off) and prepare for Day 1, here are some scriptures I will meditate on hoping to be lead to understanding. 

Proverbs 11:2 Pride leads to disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, and haughtiness before a fall.
Proverbs 18:2 Haughtiness goes before destruction, humility precedes honor. 
Psalms 27:14 Wait for the Lord; Be strong, and let your heart take courage; yes, wait patiently for the Lord.
Ecclesiastes 7:8 The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride. (ummmmm yeah, I really need to work on having more patience as well.)