16 Days to 30 - This Fickle Thing Called Love

I have loved and lost. I have been loved and hurt. I have loved and been hurt. I have guarded my heart as a result of that pain in a means of protecting myself from never experiencing that feeling again - but you know what?! I LOVE love - and everything I have encountered in past relationships has served to build my character and prove to me "this too shall pass".

When I was younger, I would wallow in my pain for eons or so it seemed - always focusing on the positive, ignoring the negative of the relationship and trying to figure out where to go from there. I always felt like I couldn't pick up the pieces per say.

As I got older, matured, and came into my own, ending relationships wasn't as hard. Don't get me wrong, walking away FOR GOOD may have taken some preparation and time - but once I was done, I was done - I would cry, drink, talk to my girlfriends, go out - whatever I felt would cure me, however, my pity parties would end abruptly. I would no longer overanalyze every aspect of what went wrong, blaming myself and trying to figure out what I could have did differently - it was over and that meant it was time to move on.

Another bad habit I used to have was feeling as though I needed a man in some capacity in my life - even if I wasn't in a committed relationship, there was always that one person who I may as well been in a relationship with - I NEVER took the time to just be single - dating no one (we have already discussed how I don't know how to date) until a few years ago - and I must say I have experienced such personal growth, learned a lot about myself, and I now know I have so much more to offer the right man. I'm not looking, but I am definitely open to the possibilities. Excited about loving again.

The one thing I want to incorporate in my next relationship is not going to bed mad at each other - I know for me, it definitely aggravates the situation the longer I simmer on an issue. And that is not healthy. At all.

Today marks my parents 28th wedding anniversary - this is my living proof relationships can work as long as you nurture them with some key ingredients: communication, loyalty, trust, respect, honesty, and forgiveness.